Anyone with a car and a nearby paved street knows that there are more people on the road than ever before. The strangest part is that most of them are in cars.

It’s gotten so bad that some of the highest trafficked cities spend a whopping 40 hours a year on average in their cars. Here are some signs you might be in one of them.

1. The first two hours of your daily commute are spent trying to fight the traffic in your driveway.

2. The guy on the radio who does the traffic reports from a helicopter files a report from his car because he’s stuck in traffic, too.

3. You run out of gas trying to travel more than 10 miles and you don’t drive a Hummer.

4. The TV weatherman’s smog alert includes a reminder not to “forget that oxygen mask when you leave the house tomorrow.”

5. The only thing that has more little accidents than your town is the Octomom.

6. The entire population suffers from “miner’s lung.”

7. You drive a Yugo that has a sleeper cab in the back.

8. The traffic report’s advice is to “turn back.”

9. Congress has less gridlock.

10. Your walk to work involves crossing a busy interstate, a river filled with starving piranhas and a mine testing field and you’re still the first one in the office.

11. Your kids were home-schooled, mostly in the family van.

12. The local Domino’s promise you a money back guarantee of “30 days or less.”

13. You lost your virginity in the back seat of your car because you never made it home that night.